Tuesday, 3 April 2012


You know how I'm planning a little bit of a travelstravaganza on finishing work on 21 June?  And how I just had a month overseas and a wedding?  And how I did a masters' degree two years ago that completely wiped me out financially?  And we're going away practically every weekend from here to 21 June because JC on a piece of toast, we're not going to live within three hours of Paris by train soon? 

I'm a lucky lady but it's freaking me out financially.

I don't regret the marriage, the honeymoon or the graduate degree.  I hope I'm unlikely to regret the experiences we'll have between now and arriving home in New Zealand.  (I'm already referring to it as home; excuse me?  When did that happen?!).  What I am regretting is the need to trade off financial stability for the purpose of my own enjoyment.

Don't get me wrong; I'm not plunging myself into the unfathomable depths of the debt sinkhole in order to have this travel blow-out.  We've simply prioritised the travel over the ability to put a good deposit down on a home sooner, rather than later.  A home or another investment, obvs.  Home ownership is not the be all and end all of investment, though it often seems that way. 

{CRY ME A RIVER, you're probably thinking.  Doesn't this self-indulgent cow know there's a frigging recession on and she's lucky to have the option to spend money this way?  Yep, not completely self-absorbed, only MOSTLY self-absorbed, so I am aware that this is a blatantly petty problem to others.   Yet I write about it because, as previously advertised, these are the chicken scratchings of a Gen-Y narcissist.}

For all that spending money makes me feel terribly, terribly guilty and panic stricken, I just spent MOAR on P's 29th birthday present.  P has purchased a stereo amp for his birthday, nominally as my bday prez for him.  He spent a very happy afternoon on Saturday setting it up, testing the sound settings, explaining the remote controls to me (which, just between you and me, was a complete waste of his time) and practically jizzing all over it.  We're justifying it on the basis that electronics are eye-wateringly expensive in Nu Zild, plus it makes him facehurt happy.  HOWEVER, I couldn't let him have nothing to unwrap on the day now could I?  Well, yes I could but I won't this year. 
The gift is an awesome frying pan.  Can you believe that frying pans can be awesome?  Well, it's true.  If I was gifted a frying pan I'd probably freak the eff out but P will genuinely love it (I think).  I actively encourage his cooking skills: previous gifts include cookbooks, gastronomic encyclopaedias, chef bios, knives, the whole bit.  Selfish, hey?  Yeah, I ate a warm lamb salad with roasted kumara and finely sliced red onion, feta and little gems last night for dinner courtesy of those gifts.  BOOM.  I assure you, it's not ALL about me though - the man has actually expressed a desire for a pan that can go from stovetop to oven. 

I think I have just done an incredibly effective job at justifiying my purchase in writing this.  Jeebus,  I can't even stick to the theme of "money spend guilts" today.

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