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Wednesday 14 March 2012

working on my pout

The major exciting news of the day is that I bought two lipsticks when dropping into the chemist for a box of tissues on the way to work.  Two cheap, bottom of the line lipsticks.  One in coral and one in red.  Impulse purchases, along with some control top tights and vitamin C because I'm glamourous that way. 

See this picture?

FROM STYLE MOGUL.  INFINITELY MORE STYLISH THAN ME.
Yeah?  Well.  The lipsticks I bought are not these brands and they are likely not those colours either.  I don't know why I can't commit to investing a decent sum in make up like the products shown above but apparently Maybelline is as fancy as I'm ever likely to get.

OH YEAH that's right - I can't commit in investing in anything decent because I'm cheap and I'm shit at applying facecake.  Don't tell me practice makes perfect because I don't really practice.  Lazy aye? 

I noticed on arrival in the UK that English lassies all like to wear a proper face at work and out to town on a Saturday night which? Fair enough.  But my version of day to day is mascara and, more often than I'd like, crappy concealer smeared over a spot.  For a flash night out, I might add some lip gloss and a spot of wonky eyeliner.  For a big meeting with real adults at work, I might slap on a bit of muted-colour lipstick (once a year perhaps?).  So my daily beauty routine can hardly be called "practicing".

Before the fabulous-month-long-February-holiday, I'd got into the zone a bit with making an effort.  And by that I mean trying to use foundation and having my eyebrows waxed on a semi-regular basis.  That went out the window within a week of arriving in New Zealand when I burnt my nose and my skin tone suddenly no longer matched the shade of English Rose foundation I'd been using.  You might say I gave up trying immediately after my wedding; poor, poor wee P.  Cursed with a wife who no longer makes an effort. 

After having made the arduous selection of tissues this morning ("Is the lily-box too funereal? Or do pink and orange gerberas just scream 'hayfever'?" THESE ARE THE BIG ISSUES, GUYS.  I GRAPPLE WITH THIS SHIT ON THE REGULAR - MY LIFE IS A VERITABLE SHITFEST OF HARD DECISIONS), I decided to "up my game" (HAHAHAHHAHAHA) and buy some new lipstick.  Adults wear lipstick!  I can too!  Trendy people wear coral and red!  I can be trendy too! 

I was completely wrong about that last - that picture was the first image result for my 'coral lipstick' image search.  It came from a beauty trend report that is nearly 9 months old - you guys, I'm so ON TREND you know?   JC on a piece of toast, everyone has probably moved to magenta or some shit while I'm still experimenting with a five quid coral throwaway. 

So, that is pretty much as exciting as March 14 2012 is as likely to get and isn't it just awesome to be me?  If any one out there (echo…echo...) has views on/experience with coral lipstick or suggestions other than a paper bag for my beauty routine, I'm all ears! 

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