Thursday, 7 March 2013

distinguishing characteristics

Murky green eyes.  Bluish, sometimes.  Bits of brown

Slightly upturned nose

Gummy smile, vanishing top lip

Mostly even teeth

No wisdom teeth

Top of left breast, faded birthmark (my left, not yours.  It’s my breast, after all)

Moles, lots

Weird lump on left knee, outer quadrant (possibly also on right knee or so my doctor says)

Lump on back of right hand, where the bones for forefinger and thumb meet

Junk in trunk

Claw-like big toes (turned up at the end)

Enormous earlobes, pierced once each

Mid-length to long hair

5’8 or 5’9

Long torso, short legs

Not fair, but not far off

I always thought that, had I been an 18th century gentleman, people might have complimented me on my well-turned calves.

Oh that reminds me: when I had my wisdom teeth removed, they put me under IV sedation.  I have some very odd memories of being told “You need to be quiet now so we can get in your mouth” and being disconcerted.  Had I REALLY just told them completely inappropriate information, while people were hovering over my open gob?  When I came to, P was there.  He took me home in a cab and felt like he was being pegged by bystanders as a daytime date rapist wielding rohypnol.  I called my mother from the cab: “You’ve got to try this stuff! It’s AH-MAZING”.  Three hours later, I didn’t feel quite so well (or high.)  P made me mashed potatoes.  It went downhill from there. 

PS Happy IWD!

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