Tuesday, 3 September 2013

scaredy cat

A thing what have given me a fright recently: the automatic scent squirter in the work bathroom.   You might think that's an odd thing to be frightened by, but then I suspect the only automatic scent squirter thingamees you've ever encountered have probably been placed high on the wall, in a corner perhaps.  Not right behind your elbow while you're sitting on the throne.  Saturating your elbow with Eau De Pink Fake Flower with a scary pump noise.  I convulsed in response - let's just be grateful it wasn't a jump, shall we? 

Another thing what has given me a fright recently: we bought a ginormous BBQ.  It's huge.  There are only two of us, but BY GOD WILL P ENTERTAIN with that bad boy.  It did some damage to the bank account (see: fright) but wasn't as bad as my fears suggested.  I think he's doing that thing where he totally oversells what he wants in order that I feel better when we find a "middle ground".  I suspect he also thinks he's pretty damn sneaky. 

Small boys living in my house have also given me frights.  I wake up at night wondering what ghost is crying in the spare bedroom before my brain registers that it's only One with a tooth giving him grief.  I'm sure it's a natural biological response, but I find the sound of upset children quite distressing.  When Three objects to his pajamas being put on or taken off (depending on the time of day), the skin over my spine shrivels.  I also find that I'm desperate to reason with him, even though his mum and dad have clearly tried that to no avail.  This morning, P resorted to "you can't stay home and watch TV all day because the TV'll break." LIES, P. I've watched you do that very thing. 

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